Djapana: Day 4: Bike tour and super tourist

Had a 'Hidden treasures' electric bike tour this morning (thanks Steve for the rec), which was over 4 hours of super-ness. It reminded me that cycling is one my most favourite ways of feeling on holidays and limber and happy with the wind in your hair :)

This is along with swimming and reading and dancing to sweet beats. Taken me a while to figure it out, but for my brain, that's my winning combo for feeling foot loose and fancy (brain) free. Formidable! (French for wonderful not reference to me being formidable when relaxed nor 'wimp refuel' as spell checker corrected my first version of wonderful). And electric bike was super fun.

Anyway.

Le tour! Token Aussie as always so lots of bad 'otherside of the world' jokes - metrics, seasons, handedness when commuting... (More on that later). So we went to lots of semi known places and found hidden historical markings and things. For example: the first ever cafe, incognito markings and deliberate 'mistakes' on giant ancient paintings in cathedrals revealing discord and old stories otherwise not documented, remnants of the first ever guillotine which is just embedded in a stone street somewhere, unmarked, seeing the concrete slab that was the first ever 'metre' for which people would travel to to measure and go home again, discovering the garden where the kings brother used to hold parties and orgies in the rooms around (until the bell at 12pm alerted them to daytime) and the garden where champagne was first ever introduced by the monk etc.... Lovely guide who was pretty knowledgeable on French history... To which I know absolutely nothing (other than getting the first question correct (most famous French: napoleon. From qn 2: what did he do, I was straight on to the back foot for the rest of the day...). But I'll definitely be doing some reading up now - such fun scandalous heinous times in France in the last few centuries!

(Ahem, ahem)

And here we have -insert monument name-, monolith situated in the Place de Concorde in Paris, which used to be a royal place for the wealthy to hang outside after dark, but now hosts the Ritz and all of the most expensive watch makers and jewellers (which yes I attempted to access... more on that later too). Anyway, this tall structure -insert height- -who really cares- which features Napoleon on top, cloaked in a toga, is made entirely out of melted down cannons from the ---- war, where Napoleon and his 48,000 troups made a mockery of the Austrian and Russian army (96,000) using napoleons trademark 'sly tactics' also known as brains. (Personally still couldnt quite woohoo like the rest about this underdog victory... that means twice as many people died!) And therein they took the cannons home from both sides and made a statue with him wearing a Togo to show that he's all Caesar-like and powerful. (Note: Lovely backdrop of renovations to the Ritz). Wonder what they're putting on there. Oh god terrible joke.

Place des Concorde

Some other royal place near the Lourve.

Moi!

Align your head with the chewing gum in the 'o' of the graffiti of the statue and voila! Paris is aligned! Pow!

Oldest cafe ever so the king could have coffee outside house. Note the slant: 2 reasons, cos rent was expensive (per metre of ground) and cos of dumping the toilette business over the edge....

One of the only churches unspoiled in the revolutions due to the landlady getting the rioters pissed on wine in the dungeon. Funded my Marie Antoinette. Now a worldwide missionary headquarters.....I'm starting to realise how much this catholic stuff is gonna be everywhere in Europe...

Oldest and tallest stairwell with no pillars to hold it up, located in above building (and another in my apartment too!)

Pantheon. Shitloads of dead famous frenchies here, inc Marie curie! And lots of other men.

The next photos are taken in the Saint Sulpice - a church only a tiny bit smaller than Notre Dame and full of huge amazing artworks (including Jacob wrestling with the angel) that are FULL of hidden messages and one of European largest organs.

Ha! Giant clam. (For holy water)

Lunch time! King crab salad!!! (Lettuce, tomato, eggs, green beans, giant slices of I think Artichoke but seriously giant slices).

Then cruised around the Place la Concorde, pretending to be rich (well not entirely, but you need a sucurity guard to open the door to even let you into each shop, so you cant have chocolate all over your face)...I'm sure they could tell my clothes were from target, but for a brief moment im sure they questioned that i might just be able to afford that $90k watch....

Then i found my favourite chocolate shop in Paris and wandered the shops a bit more. After yesterday it was strange to be in the touristy part of town. Strolled through the Tuileries gardens with ice cream (yep after the chocolate). Then onto the Musee de L'orangerie which is a gallery that holds Monet's waterlillies. This really is something else - i still remember painting our own large version of these in primary school and have been intrigued in Monet ever since, and they totally lived up to expectations. It was so so amazing to be sitting in the room with these, I have no idea how long I was there for (yada yada that old painting thing where by the longer you sit back and look, the more you see. Definitely true for these beasts!) :) :)

Then, as if my day wasn't giant enough all ready, I decided to walk to the arc de triumph via the Champs Élysées. Again another momumwnt that fully lives up to its name!

Wanna see the Arc de Triumph from lots of angles?